Feelings and Tables

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Nothing and no one lasts forever.

Feelings change.

Tables turn.

I try to remember this on my good days and it is so hard to imagine this being true on my worst days.

I can remember being so in love that I moved across the country to live out that dream. Only to end the relationship weeks later and now, have no contact with the “love of my life”. I’ve learned that feelings change.

Like I don’t even listen to Beyonce’ anymore and she used to be the only one on my ipod. I’d speak of her as if she were me and one day that suddenly seemed crazy. I dropped Ms. Sasha Fierce like a bad habit. Yes, music was my bad habit.

I’ve had other bad habits too. Some have probably included you too.

Like craving cheesecake and milkshakes until I had gained so much weight my clothes began to stretch, like my skin. Bear claws, like the donuts I ate.

And then there’s that time I lost my keys and my mind shortly after. Brained scrambled, like eggs and my legs shaking… I’ve never felt so unstable, out of my element, out of control.

I had become one of those materialistic people and it was affecting my soul.

I had to relearn who I was and whose I was. More importantly, whose I wasn’t.

I became one of those “pray for me” people. They wanted me numb. I got tired of playing dumb.

And when I talked to God he understood and explained that no one else would but not to fret

Their opinion is not a threat so you don’t have to fear what they don’t know

But life is unpredictable and sometimes, that rug is pulled so swiftly from underneath you the dust settles before you do

and there’s no where to go

So while you’re sitting on your ass just know,

Everything they’ve done to destroy you is gonna help you grow

 

 

 

 

 

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If anything is worth doing…

business, entrepreneurship, Uncategorized

…it’s worth doing well.

I can remember those words as clear as day from my 7th grade English teacher, Mrs. Parks. She was about 4 feet tall with a TWA (teeny weeny afro) that was graying and splochy. She spoke almost in a whisper – until she got mad and that always scared us as students. We respected her in a way that most kids don’t respect their elders nowadays. We trusted her; she believed in us.

She assigned us a biography project. “Find someone you look up to and discover everything you can about their life, ” she said. I was excited to do the project. I knew I would research Tupac just because I wanted to see Mrs. Parks reaction. We were given several weeks for the project, but me being the natural procrastinator that I am, I waited until the night before. Instead of being 4 pages, my report was 2. Instead of having colorful images, I turned in a portrait of Pac I had hand drawn. As Mrs. Parks glided through the room collecting reports, when she got to mine she stopped. “Keep it!” She said in her mean voice and continued to glide through the room. Keep it!? After all the work I did. You’re not even gonna grade it. These things I shouted at her to the room’s surprise. I knocked the paper off my desk and started to pout. The bell rang.

As I got up to leave the room Mrs. Parks grabbed my arm. And hard too. I wanted to scream that she couldn’t touch me ( I mean, teachers can’t be grabbing on kids), but I stood there in shock. “If anything is worth doing, its worth doing well.” she said “If you respect this person you have written about, give them the respect of doing a proper job. Otherwise, don’t waste your time.”

Of course I did the report again as it should have been done. Of course, Mrs. Parks deducted points for lateness.

The older I get the more I realize how important time is. When I want to rush through something or give 50% instead of 100, I ask myself, “is this worth doing?” If it is, I have to give it my all. If it isn’t I have to let it go and stop wasting my time. Sometimes I need this reminder.

Hard Work is Not Success

business, entrepreneurship, Uncategorized

“What got you here, won’t get you there..” – Rory Vaden

I’ve always thought of myself as a hard worker. I’ve had a job since I could remember; and most times, more than one job. I’ve started businesses and have helped others start theirs. I’m a single-mom. I’ve obtained a bachelor’s degree and am working on a Master’s. All of these things have occupied my time over the last 10 years and physically, I am exhausted. I always thought I was a hard worker, and yet, I have not reaped any of the benefits I thought I would by working hard.

Perhaps the trick is to work smarter. Plan less and take more risks. It sounds crazy saying it out loud (well, typing it on the computer), but that’s what successful people do.

My whole life I thought I was taking a chance, but I was just following a very predictable path. Maybe you are too. I was listening to a podcast the other day and the guest, Rory Vaden said, “what got you here, won’t get you there.”  He was talking about how to go beyond your plateau. He said that successful people are always finding new ways to be successful. So I am challenging myself not to get stuck in a rut of mediocrity but to find new ways to be successful.

Feel free to join me.